Parking win!

Fucking show off.

Hey you got a little close to that back bumper asshole. How am I supposed to get out of my spot now. Those tiny ass spots are there for a reason – so you don’t park there. Not so you can flex your Cruisin’ USA skills!

But I also want to make another point here. I think the Guiness book of world records is the biggest crock of shit in the world. Honestly, who gives a fuck that you hold the world record for the longest fingernails or eating the most apple pies in an hour?? The records are so farfetched now, I’m pretty sure I could hold about 10 of them if I wanted to. I definitely put up a fight for “Most Buffalo Chicken Wraps Eaten in a Week”… and then subsequently,  “Spiciest Poop Dropped”….. but you don’t see me bragging about it.

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