Aussie Mayo Crooks Slip Through Fingers of Authorities

That headline paints a really foul visual, doesn’t it? Fucking mayo. Anyways, it looks like there are some mayo thieves in Australia that have major coleslaw and potato salad plans: — From the land down under comes this troubling nugget of news: Aussie thieves have made off with a whopping 93 pounds of ill-gotten mayonnaise, which they purloined from a refrigerated warehouse near the southern city of Adelaide. The condiment criminals divided and conquered, absconding with two separate tubs of the stuff. Police sprung quickly to action, urging anyone who knows about people making large batches of coleslaw or potato salad to notify authorities immediately.

I wonder if the authorities have considered checking out public transportation for the mayo bandits…because I bet this chick (dude?) is the ringleader in this crime:


Yep, there goes my gag reflex!

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